Saturday, November 20, 2010

I am Aquarius

几乎每个水瓶座的心底都有着一段刻骨铭心人间记忆,一个永远无法忘记的背影。
那也许只是极其短暂的两情相悦,只是一种单恋,或只是一种只存在于虚幻空间,似乎只是自己一个人的事。
一切看起来是那么平静,那么和谐。
没有惊天动地,没有海誓山盟,没有花前月下,没有浪漫,没有誓言,没有温度。水瓶座的理智和冷漠,注定了任何感情永无燃点。
水瓶座不容易喜欢上一个人。有人说水瓶座对伴侣的要求太高,其实并非这样,水瓶座注重的是感觉。只是那么轻描淡写的一眼,那个人已经吸引了水瓶的所有注意力,从此目光便无法转移。
用一秒钟爱上一个人,然后再付出一生去忘记,水瓶座就是这样的试验品。
但几乎所有的水瓶都会否认在自己的身上发生一见钟情,因为一向自视清高,承认爱上一个人这钟事似乎是在侮辱自己的智商。
更多的时候是因为,连自己都没发现已经爱上。水瓶座很多时候对于感情反应非常迟钝,迟钝到每次都是最后的知情者。有时容易出现弄不清自己的感觉,不清楚自己想做什么,觉得迷惘。
在对方没有非常明确地表示感情时会退怯,觉得爱情是两厢情愿,不想勉强对方。
显得很被动,忽冷忽热,犹豫不决,极其矛盾。在没有完全确定前,决不轻易付出感情,因为怕失去。也许是缺乏安全感,也许是对自己的保护,也可以算作是一种自私。
一般水瓶座的好朋友都是经过很长世间的考察的,不仅仅是几年,而是十几年。一旦被水瓶座当作好朋友的,会赴汤蹈火掏心掏肺。
在公车上,街边,商场,水瓶老是认错人。在茫茫人海中,始终在寻找一个熟悉的身影,直到产生幻觉。
这一刻,水瓶座突然很想痛哭流涕,因为突然发现自己几近疯狂的爱上一个人,失去了理智,失去了自我。这种突如其来的感觉,很恐惧,很无助。
水瓶座不喜欢这种感觉,因为不知该如何面对。要让水瓶座主动去追逐,是件异常困难的事,在水瓶座的世界里无法承受拒绝,就是这么脆弱,无论表面上看来是多么的坚强。
水瓶座在人前总是一幅无忧无虑没心没肝的样子,不想别人看见自己的悲伤,那样会有不安全的感觉,总是在无人的地方暗自落泪。
算了,还是放在心里吧。既不用尴尬的表白然后遭到拒绝,又不会相爱容易相处难的惨烈分手。这样很好,没人看出来,可以继续貌似潇洒,只是在夜深人静的时候,会偷偷的想一个人
但是,不同了。尽管水瓶座装着多么不在乎,看都不看一眼。可是对方说的每句话都从耳朵进去,没见出来。对方提的任何过分的要求,水瓶座统统照单全收精心尽力,决对不会有半个不字。完全成为一个爱情的奴隶,可这些只是因为他爱她,至于别人,见鬼去吧。
这种情况下,如果对方使点阴谋诡计,刻意疏远避而不见或是视而不见,电话不接或是哼哈敷衍等等,水瓶会给整疯了,开始会想是什么自己地方做错了,说错话了,然后拉下面子主动讨好试探。不用多,碰壁两次,水瓶座就会有自知之明了,不会再去想是为什么会这样,也不想知道了。心里会想,原来是对方讨厌自己,不想见到自己。明白之后,表面就是绝对的安静了,可心里只有瓶子自己知道,其实安静的水瓶更可怕
这还没完,过了一段日子。对方如果突然又改变态度,水瓶座竟然能既往不咎问也不问,殷勤依旧,完全没有尊严可谈。只要能和对方开心的在一起,过去不重要,未来也不重要,面子不重要,金钱不重要,时间不重要,自己也不重要,她才是最重要的
天平失衡,感情重重的压在心底,自己却飘在了半空。太在乎对方,迷失了自我,幸福也变得虚无,因为别人给不了瓶子想要的那种幸福,除了她。
自己都不爱,谁还会珍惜。爱、就是那种不计后果的疯狂
水瓶座一旦付出,便是彻底,不可收回。
感情投入的越多越是伤的重。
最擅长的是难为自己。不想对方难过,永远都是给对方一个骄傲的理由离开,只好让自己难过。总是认为自己有超乎寻常的承受力,把自己想得太坚强,而把别人想得太脆弱。不知道,受伤的其实是自己,只是不知道如何表现出来。
爱,这个字对水瓶座来说,太沉重珍贵了,无法用语言诠释。一旦说出口,犹如远古的文物,被发掘出土暴露于空气中,变得面目全非,失去本来的价值。
所以,不轻易说。说出口,就是一辈子
只需一次,水瓶座便把一生的精力耗尽,只因执著,便落得伤痕累累。那段感情如强酸腐蚀着那颗麻木的心,穿了一个洞,再也无法弥补。时间是世界上最有力的矬子,把空洞的毛边渐渐抚平,不再搁人。每当寒风吹过,犹闻隐约凄凉的萧萧声,似挽歌,她的样子却还是那么清晰
只需一次,水瓶座便不再幻想,于是狠狠将自己摔碎,拒绝熔化拼凑。因为怕熔了记忆,怕熔了那个远远的背影,怕熔了自己千年的期盼。
之后,水瓶座依然谈笑风生,依然开朗豁达,阳光向上重复着一切,因为无法承受寂寞,无法承受没有她的日子
人们都说水瓶花心,见一个爱一个,水瓶座会哈哈一笑,说“哪有?冤啊!”。其实水瓶的爱只有一次,其实心里在滴着血,脸上却得笑的灿烂,安慰自己“我是谁啊!哪会那么弱呢!”
有人说水瓶座太冷酷太自私,自以为了不起。可是谁又了解,水瓶座的心,容量很小,只能有一个,且不具修改性。除了那个人,其她所有自动归为一种程序。
因为无法虚伪,所以甜言蜜语都吝啬给予。因为天真,所以至死之前仍在等待。因为没有勇气,所以眼睁睁放手真爱无能为力。
当看到一个瓶子在疯狂地快乐或悲伤时,请千万不要被迷惑,水瓶总是不由自主地交错操纵着快乐与悲伤。其实并不像看到的那么快乐,同样的,也不像看到的那么悲伤。只是悲伤时,喜欢带上快乐的面具,而当水瓶快乐时,悲伤又不肯轻易放过。
只有真正懂得水瓶座的人,才能看见眼底那一缕似有似无的哀伤,才能明白是什么让水瓶如此的义无反顾,是什么让水瓶变得如此忽冷忽热捉摸不定,才能体会水瓶的坚强只是竭力掩饰的脆弱。
星相上说,水瓶座往往不被所爱的人珍惜。我想,是为什么呢?也许答案就在心中,只是水瓶座的本性不愿承认而已。
水瓶座除了需要一个深爱自己包容一切的人以外,还需要一个心理医生。
如果你遇到了一个水瓶座的男孩或是女孩,他一定会把他最好的爱都给你,也许他给不了你那么多,可他把自己都给你,够么?

Copied from somewhere. It's really true.

I believed, miracle is created by human being.
I am not emo, but the descriptions were really suitable for me, an Aquarius =)

Friday, November 19, 2010

Random

Hi peeps, I am back in blogging. I have already watched Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part one. It's nice but just first part and I still have to wait until next year I guess. Why don't they combine both to one? Then I wont feel disappointed =( 
Actually I intended to watch it first day when the movie launched but Mid Valley's seats were fully booked plus premier seats need RM 18, OMG how expensive it is? I really can't imagine how much they earn for one movie. Harry Potter already became a billionaire i guess but I still need to work. Oh yea, I have received a new job which I just have to help the client to add and tag peoples by using their facebook account. Two days for Rm 90. But I think I cant even get 50 bucks. Due to too many peoples i added in a short period, facebook had already blocked me temporally. I already waited for few hours for it to unblock me. Oh please, let me continue to earn money. Anyway, it's an easy job to do and it is home based. I still can enjoy my job with my two friend, Chu Pei and Nini =D 


I read through newspaper and I thought they said Hermonie and Harry will have their first kiss, but I was disappointed after the movie, no kiss at all? Being cheated or I didn't pay my attention maybe I was drinking my water when they were kissing? LOL 






Time flies really fast, it's already November now. I am going to graduate, finish my foundation in UCSI. Where should I go for my university life? Just stick with UCSI and enjoying watching Black peoples' leng zai? LOL

To chloe: All the best in your final. I support you physically, don't forget you need to bring me to Singapore, I wanted to eat your mum's delicious meal. 


To Shinyi: Congratz you passed all your subject, dentist. 



Sunday, November 7, 2010

Busy

I am busying with my coming Mid Term. Physics is just too tough for me, whatever how many exercises I did. I still unable to get good result, i mean better? I am regretted seriously why I never listen to the parents advices. I didn't study hard when I was in Form 4 and Form 5. And cried deadly after the result had released xD


It's too late to regret T_T


Not only physics is a difficulty for me. Even the easier subject for everyone else, calculus or even math I also NEVER do well. Sucks lar me =x


What to do? Have to get more and more and more questions to practice on and as well as put eeeeeextra extra efforts in just for one subject. Oh god, I have to cover 3 subjects this semester. Should I just sacrifice my sleeping, facebook and blogging time? -.-


The last subject, Business. Stupid business, I don't have any little interested on you. Why I have to study business? I have no idea at all. And the same thing happen and even worse. I never study business before at all. How should I score in this subject? Alright, again. Pay more efforts. I can I can I can I can I can I can do it!








Oh ya, wish to perm and color my hair. My hair is super duper messy and ugly. Arg! Ugly till max!










p/s: Congratulations Yuen Pui aka Hamlou and Kai Ling aka Gzi. Although I am not sure whether the relationship status of both of you is true or not. But anyway, blessed you both. A Pei used to put extra extra more efforts than me in this case xD
Happy forever =D






Thursday, November 4, 2010

Melaka Trip

I went to Malacca! Finally I have got this chance to visit the place that I never been for long long time. Although some of the places are still remain the same, but I feel great after visited. This time around, I join Buddy club to Malacca. Anyway, we went to Tampin with bus which cost us Rm10.20. Why were we bought the ticket to Tampin but not Malacca? Because we stayed in Bubu, the orange color shirt guy house, and his house is located in Tampin. Thanks for fetching us to visit all around Malacca and the foods are seriously nice! I like the cendol the most. =D
We had our lunch after reached Malacca, and guess what? It's chicken rice ball! I enjoyed the meal till max! It's really nice. 
We also went for the cendol in Malacca, the shop is a Nyonya style. I think the owner is Nyonya? Try cendol in the hot weather like this, is just another kind of enjoyment. It's cool and sweet enough. Anyway, according to Bubu, the difference between the cendol here and others places cendol is because they added gula malacca inside the cendol. The picture below is the cendol, I know it looks not that interesting, but believe me, It is nice! 




Next, we went to St. Paul's Hill which is A Famosa. Took some pictures there, I wish to buy me a new and nice phone camera so much =(




From left: Xin Chiak, Li Yi, Yin Hui, Phooi Fun and me xD















Went to Dataran Pahlawan and Mahkota Parade too. Too bad i didn't put anything into bag xD 





End up the trip at the temple. Nice and beautiful environment. I miss Malacca 

It's me on the bom. Enjoyed the whole trip. Thanks Bubu for provided the accommodation for us, thanks Jia Shyang for introduced many new friends for me, thanks Yin Hui, Xin Chiak, Li Yi and Phooi Fun for giving me an unforgettable trip 


Wearing of the day: Top from MNG, Short from Nichii, Bag bought from Mum from China, Shoes from Vincci


P/S: I have no idea why some of the pictures are so small. Sorry for the sizes 

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Untitle

Lots of thoughts popped out from my brain recently, even myself also can't figured out what's the problem was.
I have been left behind in term of time, friends, and many more.


I missed the time when we were playing together, when we were study together, when we hang out together.
I can't even get a friend to have a meal with me, moreover study together with me. Impossible. 
Boyfriends are the only thing in the mind. 


Hey friends, where are youuuuu? 





I choose to silents when i m down
I choose to keep all in me, 
maybe, i should not complain because this is my choice.




I am happy, i told myself. 

Friday, September 3, 2010






Time flies, and it's already September now. I have been here, UCSI for nine months. I am blessed by god and the friends around me, thank you for helping me when I was facing with some troubles, when I was helpless when I was still new and tried hard to adapt the new environment. I feel great when you all filled me up with loads of stories.  Thanks for being my company =)













However, part of my life, it kind of mess up and I realized that sometime, I am so gonna learn to expect the unexpected because the peoples around us nowadays are too fake to treat as FRIEND. Real friends are hard to get, or maybe they have already extinct. So start to appreciate those who treat you nicely and choose your friend wisely too =)



"Life is like a box of chocolates, you'll never know what you're gonna get."
-Forrest Gump





Yes, these are the pictures taken while and after my work. Hmm..I am working as a promoter for Enfagrow. Yes! It is the milk powder for children 


It's kind of simple and fun. I just have to play with the children while the parents are choosing the products or tried to attract the children with the free gift so that their parents willing to buy the milk powder. I have learnt many experiences while working. And also money is not that easy to earn. I should start to use the money that given by the dad wisely because I am kind of waste. =)




And yea. I have bought one set of Hada Labo with the salary. It's nice! I was craving for them for so long and finally i own them! 






Will be work tomorrow again. Off to bed. Night world =)









I believe in Karma, those who did something badly will have pay for what they did. Yes, I am talking about you bitch! I feel sad for you. Good luck in your future 

Monday, August 30, 2010

Autumn is back


Hi everyone. I am back to blog. I deleted my last blog and opened a new account. After all, I AM ALIVE!

I am enjoying my life now. I can still live perfectly after so long. Busy with life, busy with friends while gossip, busy with my studies. Everything is just so nice to me.

Stay tune for more post.

I am active again. =)






I stop.

Catch my breath.

and move one. =]